Exorcize Hat

$50

I was overjoyed when I realized that exercise and exorcise were basically the same word minus a one letter difference. Also they sound basically the same when you say them outloud unless you’re super good at enunciation which nobody is. And then, even better, when I learned there was an acceptable alternative spelling with the “z” replacing the “s” in exorcize I was like, “daaaaamn r u kidding me this word just got even better because zees graphically speaking go super hard and this whole concept is, when you think about, which, dude, I’m always thinking about it, all about going hard.” Some people are well adjusted and that’s super good for them. I don’t know if that’s a nature thing or a nurture thing and tbh I’m not sure it matters if the net net is you’re NOT experiencing the world around you as vaguely hostile and largely inhospitable. I mean, the cognitive dissonance required just to get through lunch on any given day feels, for me, at times, insurmountable. Except, you know what, I can and do surmount it. You know why? Because it’s my civic responsibility, that’s why!!!! And because I’m curious—like, where is this thing headed, ya know. Like,I wanna see how this story ends. And also, I’m a hedonist. Like, I like feeling things and experiencing things and the world is, still, really good at providing experiences. Anyway that’s the why of it but what about the how of it. Me, personally, I need to exorcize through exercise. That’s 1000% HOW I do it. Over the years, I’ve been in so many casual conversations at parties or dinner or holiday gatherings when the topic of cycling and endurance sports comes up and I’m confronted with the presumption that endurance pursuits are about Type 1 Fun. Which, obviously I think they can be. AND DUDE, THAT’S GREAT IF THEY ARE FOR YOU. And dude, sometimes they are for me too! Yay!!!!! Buut but buuuuuuut buuutu butububuut buutub but, honestly, mostly, on the daily, for me it’s not about Type 1 Fun, it’s about thresholds, resetting, “casting out,” moving energy, zeroing out, centering, focus, pain, transformation, surging, comfort with discomfort, transcending the mundane, meditation, the sound of my heartbeat, sweating, tunnel vision, flow state, quieting the lizard, comforting the mammal, and turning the brain off. And so, if any of this sounds familiar, please buy this hat cause we made this hat for you.

Proof that we made this hat for you.

  • We commemorated this concept that is near and dear to you and your mental health through art.
  • Thank you Sasyk Mihal.
  • We put it on a hat that’s made of a TECH material (UPF50+ Fabric) for Endurance Sports.
  • The hat provides shade for your eyes and protection for the rest of your beautiful and wonderful face from mercurial and/or tempestuous weather.
  • It has a TECH toggle for adjustment: Layer under it, have a big head, have a small head, wear it under a mode-specific helmet, wear it casually, whatever just wear it.
  • It’s not a cycling cap. It’s not a running cap. It’s not for baseball.
  • It’s in a category of its own called Endurance. It’s an Endurance Hat.

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