MSO Subject Athlete Hilary LeBeuf is an American ultra trail runner living in Barcelona, Spain. In BONKED: Episode Three she tells us of a long run that tested her Physical, Spiritual, Mental, and Emotional limits.

Bonked—Short stories about Crushing Your Soul—is a new episodic series created to provide Subject Athletes, Outraverts and Cardigoths with yet another form of incredibly useful and potentially life saving Beta for when you and/or your equipment fails catastrophically. Because here’s the thing, pushing your P*S*M*E Inside The Outside in the pursuit of Transformation, Transcendence and Rapture isn’t without risk. And when it comes to Bonking, it’s not a question of if, it’s a question of when. Sooner or later you will find yourself completely empty, defeated, broken, committed and exposed on a “Death March” of your own making. How deep are you prepared to dig? How will you endure (battle) the malaizing and awesomely powerful effects—despair, doom, hypothermia, anxiety, HAPE, Sail-brain, et cetera, et cetera—in an effort to persevere; aka “get home?” Are you stubborn enough? Do you have supernatural tenacity? Point blank, listening to MSO’s Bonked series for inspiration, motivation and emptiness-based creativity may, sometime in the not too distant future, be the only difference between you getting Outside The Inside and back on your feet, or not.