Calling All Prime Hunters, Knife Fighters and Sprint Wizards!
We’ve wanted to sponsor a prime with a legit stack of cash forever and now we’re finally doing it. THREE TIMES! Thank you Tulsa Tough for this opportunity! We’re doing it to help animate the race. To reward racing and racers. Because primes are the original Knife Fights and we love Knife Fights. And finally, because when people see dollar bills IRL with their legit real face-eyes it triggers an immediate dopamine release. And here at MFS we’re committed to triggering dopamine release(s) wherever and whenever possible.
Why cash? Because, bottomline, everybody—from arms dealers and cocaine salespersons to five year-old kids in the suburbs of Des Moines looking to score some Sour Patch Kids and a pack of soccer cards—loves cash. Listen, there’s a reason you don’t make it rain with:
- Boxes of oatmeal raisin Power Bars.
- SuperCuts gift certificates.
- $35 vouchers to Leroy’s Big Giant Pig Pit Family Restaurant.
- 24-Hour Fitness memberships.
- Et cetera.
That shit is heavy/boring/stupid/nice-but-not-going-to-pay-your-rent/cumbersome/inedible. That shit is just plain not the same. As cash. In spite of eBay. But def eBay helps, thanks eBay. At least for now. Next year probably it’s blockchain or a quart of potable water, who knows, shit is weird but like I said, until then it’s straight-up American paper money. Which is why we put three stacks of $500 dollars in cash, into three different envelopes, for three different Most Animal primes, in three different races:
- Men’s Cat 3 Race – Friday, June 8th
- Women’s Pro 1/2 Race – Saturday, June 9th
- Men’s Pro 1 Race – Saturday, June 9th
*Obvs the winner of each Most Animal Prime will also get a pair of Most Animal socks.
**If you’re not registered or you suck at sprinting/winning shit, I’m also taking a short stack of Most Animal sock vouchers with me to Tulsa Tough. Each one is good for one free pair of socks. I’m not sure how you get them yet, maybe just stay in touch? Text me. Find me. Or make something up?
***Thanks to Steve Hockett for the Most Animal art.
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