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2015 USA Pro Challenge: Stage 03

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Distance 101.2 mi Number of Steps 13,414 or 6.2 miles Time of Filing 11:04 PM Accommodations Pokolodi Lodge

Today’s Objectives
Get to the race on time. ✓+++
Shoot the House of Pain at the top of Independence Pass. ✓
Eat something green. X

WIFI Details So we checked in and Daniel fired up his computer, plugged in the WiFi password (it’s Summer15 if you’re in the area, but I have a feeling they change the code every season.) and said it was like lightning. Great I thought. This is great. But this was all before I would have the chance to log into my own computer, because we left Snowmass for the Hickory House (see food report, below) in Aspen. Upon return I was giddy, I was going to be dialing up lightning, dig? A world of information was only click away. But then I logged in, and rather than a flash of lightning there was only a dim glimmer, the word connecting… appeared in a DOS-style font at the bottom of my tab, and stayed for a long time. I asked around; Daniel and Rebecca weren’t having any problems, they were riding the lightning so to speak. Despair. Minutes felt like hours, seconds felt like minutes, WTF?! Then, by the grace of God, the internet went active. I mean I could search, stream, scan, feed, all of it, all of the things the internet does and it was and it is wonderful. Let’s just pray it holds.

Weather Colorado is so sunny, 200 hundred days a year plus and, AND, it’s August, you know, summer. BUUUT we spent the day above 10,000 feet. So despite the sun and the summer it was cold and windy, at least on Independence Pass. Plus, now my lips are chapped.

Quote of the Day

“I wouldn’t mind having that strength and balance, but I wouldn’t ride a unicycle to get it.” -Rebecca Gates

“Dave Towle is the soundtrack of my life!” -Taylor Phinney

“Stan, did you pack the Baileys?” -Dale

“Get in there Dale!” -Stan

“You really want the rest of this mojito!?” -Anonymous

“Let’s get back to the pants party!” -Anonymous

“My dad had really bad cramping in Leadville.” -Anonymous

“You don’t mind if I get into my internet suit do you?” -Anonymous



First, I want to thank you for doing all the things that you do. Roofs, Floors, Doors, Sinks, Toilets, Showers, and Lights; for the most part you get these things right. But what’s up with these pillows? These pillow are all wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong. Sure, by definition they are pillows: “sealed bags stuffed with soft material”, but they are not comfortable, and comfort is really the name of the game when you’re talking about pillows. It’s not like you’re dealing with new technology here. I’ll give you WiFi, for a few more years I am going to expect your WiFi to be inconsistent. It’s only been around for a decade or so.

“But pillow tech is ancient: Mongols had em, Hittites had them, I mean cavemen were probably pondering the secret of fire while laying their heads on an appropriately formed pile of mud or leaves.”


But the pillows you’re putting in rooms completely disregard aeons of pillow development. And it’s not just one brand of hotel that has decided spit in the face of comfort, but all of you. Why?

This feels a little like a conspiracy, but I can’t see the end game? Are you so sure that we can’t do without your services that we’ll just continue to pay you to sleep on your crappy pillows? Maybe you’re simply misguided. I’ll admit that these overstuffed pillows look great all lined up dutifully on the bed, maybe you did a focus group on pillows and you didn’t go far enough, you asked people to consider what the pillows look like and not what they feel like and figured, eh, that’s good enough. Whatever the case, you have made a grave error by backing the overstuffed pillow.

These overstuffed bricks are anything but comfortable. Yes, the neck can, if need be, bend at a 90 degree angle, but it shouldn’t stay in that position. Like the 90 is a temporary thing. Keeping the neck in such a position can get really uncomfortable, and this is the opposite of what a pillow should do. See what I’m saying? The pillows that you’re supplying are disgracing the history of the pillow. It sucks. Please reconsider your approach to the pillow, because we don’t want to lose anymore sleep over it.


    High Points
  • Getting to the start of the race on time.
  • Having our friend Rebecca Gates on board as our guest Audio Expert.
  • Rebecca’s blue Rajneesh outfit.
  • Finding the Sour Gummy Bears in the center console just before departing the car for a two hour immersion in the House of Pain.
  • The fact that Eric Slack,one of the original Exergy guys, is on Team Jelly Belly and we get to yell at him!
    Low Points
  • Daniel’s flash was being a dick.
  • The start of the race.
  • Having to endure the tired licentiousness of the House of Pain for two hours.
  • The flat, bright, uncompromising white mountain light


“Kiel is what we would call one of the men in the Peloton.”


“Ted King, the untapped Maple Waffle is a 10 out of 10!”






Facts Courtesy of Wikipedia

  • Name Origin: From trees around the city.
  • Country: USA
  • State: Colorado
  • Region: Western Slope
  • County: Pitkin
  • River: Roaring Fork River
  • Elevation: 7,890 ft (2,405 m)
  • Highest Point: At SW corner of city boundary (8,460 ft – 2,579 m)
  • Lowest Point: Roaring Fork at N corner of city (7,660 ft – 2,335 m)
  • Area: 3.5 square miles (9 square kilometers)
  • Population: 6,658
  • Density: 1,900 / square mile (734 / square kilometer)
  • Settled: 1879
  • Incorporated: 1881
  • Government: Home Rule Municipality, council-manager (Aspen City Hall, 7,940 ft – 2,420 m)
  • Mayor: Steve Skadron
  • City Manager: Steve Barwick
  • Timezone: MST/MDT (UTC-7/UTC-6)
  • ZIP Codes: 81611, 81612 (PO Boxes)
  • Area Code: 970
  • Exchanges: 920-925
  • INCITS Place Code: 0803620
  • GNIS Feature ID: 0204686
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